The Smoking Alley: February 2010

2/28/10

canada... crosby!?!?

seabrook, toews, and keith all free agents monday morning. heard it here first.

2/26/10

start your weekend off right

Thoughts? Ross?

Ps. Reunion this weekend in Vancouver. Who's in?

2/23/10

At the end of the game, when Canada had finished toying with Germany, the crowd had already moved on. "We! Want! Rush! Ah!" The dude next to me had to admit he didn't like their chances against Ovechkin and the rest of them, despite the all-star team.

It may involve hacking the mainframe, but you can stream that game at 6:30p (Central) Wednesday night. USA-Switzerland is at 2p CDT.

No one's dad cursed me out, but I did get to see the hometown hero, Luongo --- "LUUUUUUUUUU!" everytime he touched the puck -- start in net. And I ran into this guy in the subway, who salutes ol' Deaner.

"Turn up the good, turn down the suck,"
Klatt

2/22/10

time to play "name that trevian"

Summer Hts.

Did you guys Hear Summer Hights High is back? well it's coming back. I for one am pretty excited.

i will fuck the old out of you

first full episode of the david cross bbc show bloggorist angie discovered a while back but was unavailable online, UNTIL NOW.

2/18/10

literacy, what does that word even mean?

not to pander to this chicken shit blago terrorizer, but this is pure coincidence. ask god, he'll tell you i was just concocting this post when i was washing the dishes from dinner - which was delish, btdubs. just what the doctor ordered after a long day of work.

without further ado, the subtitle raises a good point. have we all just forgotten about what happened the other week? am i the only one willing to ask the real questions? well, so be it.

hate to do it, but this was clearly the work of sherman. now, hear me out. so im sitting at home on a normal saturday night, drinking, drugging, playing video games...and poof! in pops a text message from matt s. this is as strange as it sounds. not only do we NEVER talk, but it's some cockimemee sext about how i better be holding on to his ipod. well, clearly this is one of two things: a.) a wrong text. no. too easy. b.) the perfect distraction to carry out his plot of changing this blog to fit his warped, jaded vision of what a perfect blog should be. well, we're not buying it sherman. you peaked in 4th grade when you hit it to the swings or trees or whatever suburban legend you had about yourself. and fyi. i did have your ipod and i DID swap it to some dude in tacoma for some naked pictures (of your mother).

which leads me to my next point. i submit to the court that josh was the real culprit of changing the blog to some bullshit brown poop on a innocent sunday morning. he clearly had the most to gain. who is the one who quickly jumped to the rescue of changing the blog "back" (we all know this is not the same, and g's b has been defiled, deflowered, ravaged forever), hmm? and then he starts listing off all the things he did, and almost got away with sliding "made the blog private" past you all. let me back up. he DID slide it past you all. except this guy. josh,

king of posting obnoxious pix like this:

suddenly makes gryll's b private? a little too convenient, wouldn't ya say? here's what really happened. josh knocked a girl up. there i said it. couldn't let you get away with it, josh. think about it. he dumby up's this story about moving down to the big easy to follow some film crew or roadie for kings of leon or something, i don't know, i didn't really read his post about all the details. and then all too perfectly delayed, he waddles over, spreads his cheeks, and drops a big chocolate monkey all over the basement. all the pieces fit. the blog poop was a distraction. keep the group blissfully entertained by the blog's dazzling new "who-done-it" caper, while he slinks out of responsibility. the blog poop was a conspiracy! he's gotta get the fuck out of dodge...aka the nyc. and has to cover his tracks in the process. really josh. a baby?

which leads me to my last point.

you almost got away with bobby. staying on the sideline. biting his time to pull a ninja move.

and finish it off with a little me time. so last saturday, i was at the hawks game. in real prime time seats. compliments to gryll, especially cuz he surprised me, and the millers. anyway 2nd period, midish way through, patty kane's in a scrum or something in front of the net, so naturally i yelled "hit him like a cabbie!!!" bamn, expecting a little laughs. what do i get, a lot of "dude, kane's dad is right there." turn to my left and get a glaring stinkeye square at my ugly mug. then old man kane says, "go fuck yourself." it was awesome. go usa!!

2/14/10

The Freak is freaking paid

Tim Lincecum needs to pitch less than an inning to make my yearly salary. Ming, I wish you had helped me to develop my hitting when we were younger.

Find out how you stack up...

2/13/10

Hey Sherman, Free poster.

Print it

Biathlon, Nordic combined and ice dancing tournament

Ski a little bit, then shoot the gun. Tim Burke is your darkhorse hero. What's not to like?

Plus some hockey thrown in. I'm psyched. You're psyched.

2/11/10

Animalympics

was a movie I watched on Disney growing up, probably lying on the ground on a saturday afternoon with some Handi-Snacks (complete with little red chee-spread claw!). Apparently, it was a full hour-length feature commissioned by NBC before the 1980 summer olympics; however, since we ended up boycotting the 1980 olympics in moscow, only the half-hour winter show made it to the small screen, broadcast in tandem with NBC's coverage of the games in Lake Placid. Animalympics later aired in full on HBO and was rebroadcast (with edits) on Disney, enjoying a cult following for years to follow. Voices include Billy Chrystal, Gilda Radner, and Harry Shearer. The soundtrack is out of print, but a copy fetches you 50 bones on Amazon. Complete video here.